*Shrugs*

Although I've known this for years, it only seems fair to say to the city of my birth - I'm too good for you.

I'll always love Sudbury. To some extent, it will always be home to me. It's the place where my family lives. It hosts a load of familiar places, faces, smells and sights. It's where a quarter of a century's worth of memories were made. But at the same time, it just doesn't seem the same, you know? It's like those TV shows where you see a grown child staying with his or her parents, in their old childhood bedroom which has been kept exactly as it was when they were teenagers. Everytime I go back, I feel older, wiser, and in all honesty, too good for Sudbury.

So, it would seem odd that we're looking to move back in a few months, wouldn't it?

Well, like I said, it's the place where my family lives. Edmonton is booming too big and it's going to crumble under its own growth soon enough. And I don't want to be one of its casulties. So that's part of the reason. I mean, if we lose the house, we lose how much money, above and beyond what is still outstanding on the mortgage? Not to mention, like we can truly afford 1400 a month in daycare, and there's no way we can survive out here without two incomes. Everywhere you look, there's a "day home", and the prevelance of them all doesn't make me comfortable thinking that they're being watched properly or licensed accordingly. That and you get what you pay for, and G Jr has enjoyed and learned so much at his current daycare, that I would be conflicted with the idea of pulling him and placing the two of them in some other care center.

Yet still, Sudbury thinks its all that and a bag of chips, so I'm sure that I'll have trouble as I did before finding decent work. But this time, I plan on being a bitch. I'd like to see someone try to say that I don't have experience now. 2.5 years of keeping the training department of an international computer company's office in Edmonton afloat, providing various levels of training to people of various degrees of technical knowledge (and IQ, I swear) on various technologies and skills? Yeah, I may not have the experience to be a brain surgeon, but I'd love for them to prove I don't have the skills to be a tech. Plus, I'm loving how that since my departure, the training department in Edmonton has become the laughing stock of the head office of my old employer >:) What can I say? The only person who didn't understand that I was the best damned thing they had was my boss. Even the head office is saying "If we had Menerva there, we'd be able to do that." I'm LOVING that! Mind you, that and a buck won't get me a coffee.

And I already know how it's going to go. We've told everyone out there that this isn't a permenant thing. That if Sudbury doesn't work out again, we're off to wherever we can make things work. If that means Edmonton again, then so be it. Could be anywhere between BC and the east coast. The plan is at least to stick around the Sudbury area for at least 3 to 5 years. The first few months, people will be all excited that we're back. There will be phone calls, visits, etc. And then after that, it'll wane horribly, to the point where if we don't instigate the calls or visits, they'll barely happen. They'll take for granted that we're here, and people will go back to contacting us because Gunther has a truck and they could use his help, or if their computer is on the fritz, and then they'll be shocked as hell when we say we're packing up and moving again. How do I know this will happen? Cause I know our families, and its exactly how they reacted to our original move to Edmonton. Plus, it's how we get treated to some extent now. Phone calls grow short and far apart, visits are limited... And we still want to move back? Well, we're doing it more for the little G's. They deserve to know their family. I can put up with being ignored... I know that they wouldn't ignore them.

Over the years I've developed a stronger introverted, self sufficent personality. And I think it'll get stronger when I move back. And perhaps I'm just being bitter and pessimistic but I'd rather think of it as realistic and jaded. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt, own the company. Gunther and I have survived this long without our families around, and could do so for years longer. While I still need them, I haven't been dependant on any of them for ages. I think it's just that I feel bad that I don't feel they need me.